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Scarred Skin and Wiggling Worms: What I Learned from my Eating Disorder 伤痕累累的皮肤和蠕动的蠕虫:我从饮食失调中学到的东西
IF 0.4 3区 文学
Life Writing Pub Date : 2022-11-11 DOI: 10.1080/14484528.2022.2137907
Jinane El Khoury
{"title":"Scarred Skin and Wiggling Worms: What I Learned from my Eating Disorder","authors":"Jinane El Khoury","doi":"10.1080/14484528.2022.2137907","DOIUrl":"https://doi.org/10.1080/14484528.2022.2137907","url":null,"abstract":"ABSTRACT I was 36 years old when I was diagnosed with binge eating disorder, which was a shock. I was sitting in my dietician’s office, holding my newborn in my arms, expecting to receive the regular recommendation of specific ingredients and a food plan. But instead of prescribing a diet, Dr. R. helped me take the first step to recovery. Learning about eating disorders and body dissatisfaction allowed me to see a mirror image in my clinical practice as a dermatologist. I started recognising somatic manifestations of psychological distress on my patients’ faces. Just as my obsession with the number on the scale ultimately hid a deeper emotional trauma, I started noticing that some of my patients, obsessively focused on their pores and acne scars, were in fact battling with their own mental health. Writing in the backdrop of a global pandemic, the Beirut port explosion, and Lebanon’s economic collapse, itself exacerbating a nationwide mental health crisis, I share my struggle with my body image and eating disorder, and how it changed my practice of medicine.","PeriodicalId":43797,"journal":{"name":"Life Writing","volume":"20 1","pages":"773 - 782"},"PeriodicalIF":0.4,"publicationDate":"2022-11-11","publicationTypes":"Journal Article","fieldsOfStudy":null,"isOpenAccess":false,"openAccessPdf":"","citationCount":null,"resultStr":null,"platform":"Semanticscholar","paperid":"47767399","PeriodicalName":null,"FirstCategoryId":null,"ListUrlMain":null,"RegionNum":3,"RegionCategory":"文学","ArticlePicture":[],"TitleCN":null,"AbstractTextCN":null,"PMCID":"","EPubDate":null,"PubModel":null,"JCR":null,"JCRName":null,"Score":null,"Total":0}
引用次数: 0
Truman in Beirut: Journeying Through Fear and Immobility 杜鲁门在贝鲁特：穿越恐惧和不可移动的旅程
IF 0.4 3区 文学
Life Writing Pub Date : 2022-11-11 DOI: 10.1080/14484528.2022.2137908
Pia Maria Bou Doleh
{"title":"Truman in Beirut: Journeying Through Fear and Immobility","authors":"Pia Maria Bou Doleh","doi":"10.1080/14484528.2022.2137908","DOIUrl":"https://doi.org/10.1080/14484528.2022.2137908","url":null,"abstract":"ABSTRACT After an incident at home leads to a ruptured tendon and forces me into immobility for four months – a period extended by the negligence and indifference of a starved medical system in Lebanon – I grow aware of the mirrored mental stagnation and disorientation that plagues the population as a result of desensitisation. In this autobiographical exploration, I delve into the distinction between physical and psychological stagnation. Foregrounding Lebanon’s infrastructure of dysfunction and absurdity, which lives on through a corrupt ruling class and a traumatised war generation, I bridge the already infinitesimal gap between family and state, drawing a lived picture of a fatherless collective that thrives on serial trauma, denial, and nostalgia. Finally, as I revisit a few of Lebanon’s past artistic expressions featuring the search for national identity, I suggest that this identity, which has perhaps always revolved around its lack thereof, both within and without the border, drives us yet again to search for meaning, no matter where we stand.","PeriodicalId":43797,"journal":{"name":"Life Writing","volume":"20 1","pages":"713 - 725"},"PeriodicalIF":0.4,"publicationDate":"2022-11-11","publicationTypes":"Journal Article","fieldsOfStudy":null,"isOpenAccess":false,"openAccessPdf":"","citationCount":null,"resultStr":null,"platform":"Semanticscholar","paperid":"45859033","PeriodicalName":null,"FirstCategoryId":null,"ListUrlMain":null,"RegionNum":3,"RegionCategory":"文学","ArticlePicture":[],"TitleCN":null,"AbstractTextCN":null,"PMCID":"","EPubDate":null,"PubModel":null,"JCR":null,"JCRName":null,"Score":null,"Total":0}
引用次数: 1
Fleeing Father 逃亡的父亲
IF 0.4 3区 文学
Life Writing Pub Date : 2022-10-23 DOI: 10.1080/14484528.2022.2137916
R. Woods
{"title":"Fleeing Father","authors":"R. Woods","doi":"10.1080/14484528.2022.2137916","DOIUrl":"https://doi.org/10.1080/14484528.2022.2137916","url":null,"abstract":"","PeriodicalId":43797,"journal":{"name":"Life Writing","volume":"20 1","pages":"635 - 638"},"PeriodicalIF":0.4,"publicationDate":"2022-10-23","publicationTypes":"Journal Article","fieldsOfStudy":null,"isOpenAccess":false,"openAccessPdf":"","citationCount":null,"resultStr":null,"platform":"Semanticscholar","paperid":"43867010","PeriodicalName":null,"FirstCategoryId":null,"ListUrlMain":null,"RegionNum":3,"RegionCategory":"文学","ArticlePicture":[],"TitleCN":null,"AbstractTextCN":null,"PMCID":"","EPubDate":null,"PubModel":null,"JCR":null,"JCRName":null,"Score":null,"Total":0}
引用次数: 0
Autobiography as Archival Act: Reckoning with Personal and Political Pasts in They Called You Dambudzo and Cocktail Hour Under the Tree of Forgetfulness 自传作为档案行为:在《他们称你为丹布佐》和《遗忘树下的鸡尾酒时光》中对个人和政治过去的清算
IF 0.4 3区 文学
Life Writing Pub Date : 2022-10-20 DOI: 10.1080/14484528.2022.2136500
L. Englund
{"title":"Autobiography as Archival Act: Reckoning with Personal and Political Pasts in They Called You Dambudzo and Cocktail Hour Under the Tree of Forgetfulness","authors":"L. Englund","doi":"10.1080/14484528.2022.2136500","DOIUrl":"https://doi.org/10.1080/14484528.2022.2136500","url":null,"abstract":"ABSTRACT This paper investigates the archival dimension in two autobiographical texts that combine personal memoir with biography. The two memoirs They Called You Dambudzo by Flora Veit-Wild and Cocktail Hour Under the Tree of Forgetfulness by Alexandra Fuller document and examine the lives of loved ones in connection to the authors’ own experiences. Veit-Wild writes about her relationship with canonised Zimbabwean writer Dambudzo Marechera, and Fuller focuses on her mother’s life in Kenya, Rhodesia/Zimbabwe, and Zambia. The examined texts suggest that the archival act enables a reckoning with complex pasts through the documentation of personal life and the life of others. The analysis of the memoirs suggests that the autobiography as archive can eventually be seen as greater than its separate parts, as going far beyond the individual experiences it portrays. This is particularly important for the personal and socio-political reckoning in which it engages, relating to the colonial and racial past of Zimbabwe.","PeriodicalId":43797,"journal":{"name":"Life Writing","volume":"20 1","pages":"509 - 526"},"PeriodicalIF":0.4,"publicationDate":"2022-10-20","publicationTypes":"Journal Article","fieldsOfStudy":null,"isOpenAccess":false,"openAccessPdf":"","citationCount":null,"resultStr":null,"platform":"Semanticscholar","paperid":"43128361","PeriodicalName":null,"FirstCategoryId":null,"ListUrlMain":null,"RegionNum":3,"RegionCategory":"文学","ArticlePicture":[],"TitleCN":null,"AbstractTextCN":null,"PMCID":"","EPubDate":null,"PubModel":null,"JCR":null,"JCRName":null,"Score":null,"Total":0}
引用次数: 0
From the Inside: Indigenous-Settler Reflections on the Family uses of the Thomas Dick ‘Birrpai’ Photographic Collection 1910–1920 从内部看：原住民对托马斯·迪克·比尔帕伊1910–1920年摄影集家庭用途的思考
IF 0.4 3区 文学
Life Writing Pub Date : 2022-10-18 DOI: 10.1080/14484528.2022.2121152
J. Heath, Ashley Barnwell
{"title":"From the Inside: Indigenous-Settler Reflections on the Family uses of the Thomas Dick ‘Birrpai’ Photographic Collection 1910–1920","authors":"J. Heath, Ashley Barnwell","doi":"10.1080/14484528.2022.2121152","DOIUrl":"https://doi.org/10.1080/14484528.2022.2121152","url":null,"abstract":"ABSTRACT In the settler colonial context, family histories can be key places to explore the relations between Indigenous and settler families, past and present. In this paper we examine this use of family history with reference to a historical photographic collection that links our two families. The Thomas Dick Photographic Collection (TDPC) was produced over a ten-year period, from 1910 to 1920, as a collaboration between the amateur photographer Thomas Dick and several Birrpai families. The photographs, reflecting Dick's colonial mindset, were staged as pre-contact and sought to depict Birrpai life of a century earlier. The images are now held in local, national and international collections. The TDPC holds particular familial significance for both Heath and Barnwell, who are respectively descendants of the Bugg-Dungay family (featured in the photographs) and the Dick family (the photographer). Heath is the foremost expert on Dick's Birrpai collection, and has done extensive work; to locate the photographs in inter/national collections; to determine and correctly label the participants and places featured; and to develop a set of cultural protocols for its use in dialogue with a Family Stakeholder Group (FSG) and key collecting institutions. The FSG Protocols provide an indication of the value and use of the images as preferred by descendants. In this paper we write about the role of the photographs as family photographs in both the Bugg-Dungay family and the Dick family, including when we each first saw the photographs and what these initial encounters reveal about how such photographs, when looking at them and beyond them, can be used to both construct and deconstruct settler mythologies of time and history.","PeriodicalId":43797,"journal":{"name":"Life Writing","volume":"20 1","pages":"163 - 182"},"PeriodicalIF":0.4,"publicationDate":"2022-10-18","publicationTypes":"Journal Article","fieldsOfStudy":null,"isOpenAccess":false,"openAccessPdf":"","citationCount":null,"resultStr":null,"platform":"Semanticscholar","paperid":"46992585","PeriodicalName":null,"FirstCategoryId":null,"ListUrlMain":null,"RegionNum":3,"RegionCategory":"文学","ArticlePicture":[],"TitleCN":null,"AbstractTextCN":null,"PMCID":"","EPubDate":null,"PubModel":null,"JCR":null,"JCRName":null,"Score":null,"Total":0}
引用次数: 3
American ‘Goddess of Mercy’ in the Nanjing Massacre: Minnie Vautrin and the Afterlife of Her Wartime Diary 南京大屠杀中的美国“观音”：米妮·沃特林及其战时日记的来龙去脉
IF 0.4 3区 文学
Life Writing Pub Date : 2022-10-13 DOI: 10.1080/14484528.2022.2125852
Pingfan Zhang
{"title":"American ‘Goddess of Mercy’ in the Nanjing Massacre: Minnie Vautrin and the Afterlife of Her Wartime Diary","authors":"Pingfan Zhang","doi":"10.1080/14484528.2022.2125852","DOIUrl":"https://doi.org/10.1080/14484528.2022.2125852","url":null,"abstract":"ABSTRACT This article examines the life and diary of the ‘American Goddess of Mercy’—Minnie Vautrin, who managed an all-women refugee camp during the notorious Nanjing Massacre in China. Starting with a concise biography of Vautrin, this article probes her embodiment of cross-cultural identities and pioneering role in Chinese women’s educational reform. In particular, I highlight the dual function of her wartime diary and how her descriptions of sexual violations unveiled the convoluted gender and racial power politics in the refugee camp. For the past few decades Vautrin’s diary has inspired a myriad of literary and cinematic works featuring the Nanjing Massacre transnationally. I examine the afterlife of Vautrin’s diary by mainly focusing on the characterisations of Vautrin and Chinese heroines in a constellation of novels and films which manage to reimagine stories out of the silence, gaps, and aporia in her diary. I contend that such a way of writing out of silence and fissures in Vautrin’s life writings revisits the American Goddess of Mercy myth and gives voice to the violated Chinese women who are usually marginalised in official historical discourse.","PeriodicalId":43797,"journal":{"name":"Life Writing","volume":"20 1","pages":"239 - 255"},"PeriodicalIF":0.4,"publicationDate":"2022-10-13","publicationTypes":"Journal Article","fieldsOfStudy":null,"isOpenAccess":false,"openAccessPdf":"","citationCount":null,"resultStr":null,"platform":"Semanticscholar","paperid":"43705131","PeriodicalName":null,"FirstCategoryId":null,"ListUrlMain":null,"RegionNum":3,"RegionCategory":"文学","ArticlePicture":[],"TitleCN":null,"AbstractTextCN":null,"PMCID":"","EPubDate":null,"PubModel":null,"JCR":null,"JCRName":null,"Score":null,"Total":0}
引用次数: 0
Illnesses of Illusion and Disillusionment: From Euphoria to Aporia 幻觉和幻灭的疾病:从欣快到不安
IF 0.4 3区 文学
Life Writing Pub Date : 2022-10-13 DOI: 10.1080/14484528.2022.2127627
G. Sadaka
{"title":"Illnesses of Illusion and Disillusionment: From Euphoria to Aporia","authors":"G. Sadaka","doi":"10.1080/14484528.2022.2127627","DOIUrl":"https://doi.org/10.1080/14484528.2022.2127627","url":null,"abstract":"ABSTRACT This essay explores how engaging linguistic patterns and philosophical aporias in writing has helped me cope with the pains of disillusionment of quotidian life in Lebanon. Three Ps cause and aggravate my illness: the Protests, Pandemic, and Pandæmonium. I name my illness 3P and I seek a rhyming therapy in writing—a 3P-Therapy—to combat my illness of illusion and disillusionment. The pattern of confrontation and self-destruction recurring in the arena of Lebanese politics enables me to trace a linguistic expression of such a pattern in the double consonant ‘l’ found in the words illness, illusion, and disillusionment (ll appears as the deceptively similar looking 1–1/one to one). I explain that the ‘ll’ as 1–1 represses an inherent strife between self and self on the personal level, simultaneously as it betrays a 1–1 confrontation between self and other on the political level. The Port Blast becomes this force of disillusionment that suddenly makes the euphoria of being Lebanese transfigure into an aporia in which it is hard to determine whether I am alive or dead, having hopeful fears or fearful hopes, being a citizen of the world or a monstrosity of stoic survival.","PeriodicalId":43797,"journal":{"name":"Life Writing","volume":"20 1","pages":"783 - 794"},"PeriodicalIF":0.4,"publicationDate":"2022-10-13","publicationTypes":"Journal Article","fieldsOfStudy":null,"isOpenAccess":false,"openAccessPdf":"","citationCount":null,"resultStr":null,"platform":"Semanticscholar","paperid":"44602243","PeriodicalName":null,"FirstCategoryId":null,"ListUrlMain":null,"RegionNum":3,"RegionCategory":"文学","ArticlePicture":[],"TitleCN":null,"AbstractTextCN":null,"PMCID":"","EPubDate":null,"PubModel":null,"JCR":null,"JCRName":null,"Score":null,"Total":0}
引用次数: 3
On the Vulnerability of Memory and the Power of Storytelling, or How My Grandmothers Made Me a Historian 关于记忆的脆弱性和讲故事的力量，或者我的祖母如何让我成为一名历史学家
IF 0.4 3区 文学
Life Writing Pub Date : 2022-10-10 DOI: 10.1080/14484528.2022.2127628
Sana Tannoury-Karam
{"title":"On the Vulnerability of Memory and the Power of Storytelling, or How My Grandmothers Made Me a Historian","authors":"Sana Tannoury-Karam","doi":"10.1080/14484528.2022.2127628","DOIUrl":"https://doi.org/10.1080/14484528.2022.2127628","url":null,"abstract":"ABSTRACT The deaths of both my grandmothers, at different intervals, created for me a crisis of memory. While one grandmother died before I could preserve enough memories of her, the other died following a long battle against memory loss. As I reflect upon memory, particularly as a matrilineal inheritance, I also ask what else do we inherit as women from our grandmothers and mothers. We inherit the stories along with the illnesses. We inherit trauma as well. In this essay, I explore the power of storytelling, and its link to memory and memory loss, particularly in relation to our experiences with compounded and intergenerational trauma from generations past in Lebanon, and to my own personal trauma of the cataclysmic event of August 4. I ponder whether it is this ‘inheritance’ that made me so invested in the preservation of the past. My grandmothers have made me a historian and so I write to remember, to run away from the inevitability of my loss of memory.","PeriodicalId":43797,"journal":{"name":"Life Writing","volume":"20 1","pages":"685 - 694"},"PeriodicalIF":0.4,"publicationDate":"2022-10-10","publicationTypes":"Journal Article","fieldsOfStudy":null,"isOpenAccess":false,"openAccessPdf":"","citationCount":null,"resultStr":null,"platform":"Semanticscholar","paperid":"45790411","PeriodicalName":null,"FirstCategoryId":null,"ListUrlMain":null,"RegionNum":3,"RegionCategory":"文学","ArticlePicture":[],"TitleCN":null,"AbstractTextCN":null,"PMCID":"","EPubDate":null,"PubModel":null,"JCR":null,"JCRName":null,"Score":null,"Total":0}
引用次数: 0
Head Above Water: Reflections on Illness 头顶水：对疾病的思考
IF 0.4 3区 文学
Life Writing Pub Date : 2022-09-26 DOI: 10.1080/14484528.2022.2125279
R. Douglas
{"title":"Head Above Water: Reflections on Illness","authors":"R. Douglas","doi":"10.1080/14484528.2022.2125279","DOIUrl":"https://doi.org/10.1080/14484528.2022.2125279","url":null,"abstract":"","PeriodicalId":43797,"journal":{"name":"Life Writing","volume":"20 1","pages":"631 - 634"},"PeriodicalIF":0.4,"publicationDate":"2022-09-26","publicationTypes":"Journal Article","fieldsOfStudy":null,"isOpenAccess":false,"openAccessPdf":"","citationCount":null,"resultStr":null,"platform":"Semanticscholar","paperid":"47201931","PeriodicalName":null,"FirstCategoryId":null,"ListUrlMain":null,"RegionNum":3,"RegionCategory":"文学","ArticlePicture":[],"TitleCN":null,"AbstractTextCN":null,"PMCID":"","EPubDate":null,"PubModel":null,"JCR":null,"JCRName":null,"Score":null,"Total":0}
引用次数: 1
Ta(l)king Back (to) the City—Fragments of Beirut and/in Me 国王回到贝鲁特的城市碎片和/在我
IF 0.4 3区 文学
Life Writing Pub Date : 2022-09-25 DOI: 10.1080/14484528.2022.2114123
Farah Aridi
{"title":"Ta(l)king Back (to) the City—Fragments of Beirut and/in Me","authors":"Farah Aridi","doi":"10.1080/14484528.2022.2114123","DOIUrl":"https://doi.org/10.1080/14484528.2022.2114123","url":null,"abstract":"ABSTRACT In Beirut, I struggle to write the city. I grew up amidst a raging civil war (1975-1990) and accompanied the city from one bout of violence to another. Having spent parts of my childhood either hiding from bombs or moving houses, I grew up claustrophobic, terrified of new spaces. My relationship with the city has always been one of constant negotiation and contestation: of my place and my body, of the allowed and the denied, of survival. I discovered that walking and writing Beirut are inseparable endeavours and practices: political and personal, embodied and poetic. But how would one write a city constantly displacing herself? Constantly violating her own terms? and how do you convince your body that being claustrophobic in open space defies the very definition of the term? In this piece, I write to understand, to reconcile with my body/city, to feel less confined. I write to try to find a holding centre in ruins.","PeriodicalId":43797,"journal":{"name":"Life Writing","volume":"20 1","pages":"735 - 745"},"PeriodicalIF":0.4,"publicationDate":"2022-09-25","publicationTypes":"Journal Article","fieldsOfStudy":null,"isOpenAccess":false,"openAccessPdf":"","citationCount":null,"resultStr":null,"platform":"Semanticscholar","paperid":"48105753","PeriodicalName":null,"FirstCategoryId":null,"ListUrlMain":null,"RegionNum":3,"RegionCategory":"文学","ArticlePicture":[],"TitleCN":null,"AbstractTextCN":null,"PMCID":"","EPubDate":null,"PubModel":null,"JCR":null,"JCRName":null,"Score":null,"Total":0}
引用次数: 0
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