'I do not feel well here as such. But it has become my home': abandonment and care in healing shrines.

Abstract In thinking about care, much research has focused on kin relations, family-related care, and formal (medical) or informal care providers. Yet, how do we understand care responsibilities in contexts where kin care is absent despite being a desired social norm, and people turn to other community sources or practices? This paper draws on ethnographic research in a Sufi religious shrine in western India well-known for providing succor to those in distress, including those with mental illness. Interviews were conducted with pilgrims who had left homes due to strained relationships with kin members. For many of them, the shrine emerged as a sanctuary, even while not entirely a safe one, allowing women to live alone. While both academic research on mental health institutions and state responses have delved into the abandoned or ‘dumped woman’ in long-stay institutions or care homes, this paper argues that ‘abandonment’ is not a straightforward condition, but rather a dynamic discourse that works in different ways. For women bereft of kinship ties, narratives of being abandoned by kin became ways of justifying long (and sometimes permanent) residence in religious shrines, which were able to absorb such ‘abandoned’ pilgrims who had nowhere else to go, even if half-heartedly so. Importantly, these alternative forms of living made possible by shrines reflect women’s agency, enabling women to live alone even while belonging to a community. In a context with limited social security options for women in precarious family situations, these care arrangements become significant, even if they are informal and ambivalent forms of care. Keywords: kinship; abandonment; agency; care; religious healing