Shame and reunions: A new look at the compulsion to repeat

Abstract

ABSTRACT The concept of the repetition compulsion has spawned reams of professional literature about its role in intimate relationships. In this article, the author briefly outlines some of this literature before presenting her own view of the health-producing potential of the compulsion to repeat. In her work with adult partners in treatment, she views them as continually accessing historically dissociated affects through their repetitive conflicts, making these affects more available for metabolizing. The author sees this repetition as an inevitable and useful path to healing previously unmetabolized wounds, traumas and losses. The article illustrates this perspective of repetition compulsion through the description of the treatment of shame in couple therapy.