Empathy expectations: Trait empathy exacerbates apologetic offenders' negative reactions to non-forgiveness

Abstract

Victims have the prerogative to withhold forgiveness. However, offenders who apologize may believe that they have acted correctly and can feel wronged by victims who refuse to forgive in return. Indeed, apologetic offenders can perceive victims' non-forgiveness as violating an apology-forgiveness reciprocity norm and as a threat to their own sense of status/power, which makes offenders perceive themselves as victims, and less willing to engage in further reconciliatory behaviour. The present research investigates whether offenders' trait empathy can qualify these destructive responses to non-forgiveness. We originally theorized that a greater capacity to empathize with victims may help offenders better understand victims' non-forgiveness and react less negatively to it. Across three studies (combined N = 1000), we find evidence of the contrary—offenders who have high trait empathy tend to react more negatively to non-forgiving victims. Our findings suggest this is because empathic offenders believe that victims should reciprocate their reparatory action with an empathic response. This presents a conundrum for repair processes that promote empathy.