“So fast on the keys, when do you have time to meet”: Interactionally generated invitations in Danish Tinder chats

Abstract

This paper investigates how Tinder users in Denmark interactionally generate invitations to meet through post-match chats. Based on a collection of 194 Tinder chats collected in 2020, from which 19 examples involving invitations were identified and analyzed using methodology inspired by Conversation Analysis focusing on the strategies used to navigate the delicate process of proposing a meeting.

The paper analyzed three ways of generating invitations interactionally: 1) interpreting response time as an indicator of interest, where quick replies are taken as signs of engagement and willingness to meet; 2) basing the invitation on contextually favorable conditions, such as weather or proximity, which are framed as low-effort and convenient for the recipient; and 3) utilizing self-disclosure to propose meeting activities that align with the recipient’s preferences or personal information revealed during the chat.

These strategies allow users to test the waters before asking for a meeting, thus minimizing the likelihood of rejection. By treating invitations as collaborative actions, where the recipient’s interest is implied rather than directly solicited, users manage the potential social risks involved in proposing face-to-face interactions. The findings highlight the unique affordances of Tinder as a platform, such as timestamps and geolocation features, which shape the way invitations are constructed and understood. This study contributes to existing research on digital communication by showing how invitations in online dating are interactionally achieved through subtle, recipient-designed strategies that exploit the app’s features while preserving face and mitigating social risks.