A qualitative analysis and evaluation of social support received after experiencing a broken marriage engagement and impacts on holistic health

Abstract

This study provides new insights into the role of social sup- port in the largely unexplored field of broken marriage engage- ments and an individual’s wellbeing. The study extends the optimal matching theory (OMT) and the research surrounding helpful, unhelpful, and mixed social support. It uses constant comparison to examine the social support messages individuals received after telling others their engagement ended, as de- scribed in 43, in-depth, semi-structured interviews. Six types of helpful support messengers, six types of unhelpful support mes- sengers, and four mixed messenger types were found. Receiver- centric messengers were found to be more helpful than messengers who centered on their own feelings and needs, sometimes to the detriment of the receiver’s own wellbeing. Being present, thoughtful, and intentional with words, can have a positive impact on a person’s holistic health, regardless of whether the relationship is a weak-tie or strong-tie. Using study findings, the broken engagement message stoplight is proposed, detailing messages that are generally helpful to a person’s over- all wellbeing, messages that should likely be avoided, and mes- sages that should be said cautiously when interacting with someone experiencing a broken engagement.