Acceptance and Rejection Experiences of Men: Disclosures in Integrated Psychotherapy

Abstract

The need to be accepted is one of the fundamental needs of any human being. The experience of being rejected not only hinders one’s interpersonal functioning but also personal growth. Rejection spurts strong emotional experience among humans. Interpersonal issues as well as emotions can be examined through two different approaches that help delineate rejection patterns. Emotion Focussed Therapy (EFT) and Core Conflictual Relationship Themes (CCRT) approaches facilitate exploration of adult interpersonal relationships, shed light on the central conflicts experienced by individuals, and explore emotional markers in therapy. This study explores acceptance and rejection experiences of men through an integration of EFT and CCRT approaches. Thirty-four therapy sessions of 4 men seen in individual psychotherapy formed the study sample. Sessions were audio recorded and coded for core conflictual relationship themes and emotions. The results show that 81 relationship episodes were reported during therapy sessions. These were about experiences of rejection from others, need to be accepted and to be close to others, and helplessness and disappointment experienced within oneself. Emotions of helplessness, anger, regret, embarrassment and fear or anxiety were also evident. Emotions of ‘hurt’, ‘embarrassment’ and ‘anger’ have been found to be related with experiences of rejection by significant others. In 3 of the 4 clients, the formulations for acceptance and rejection experiences and associated primary emotions emerged conclusively showing the usefulness of the integrated approach in psychotherapy with men.