Le sentiment de solitude dans le couple et l’impact de la crise sanitaire : une revue de la littérature

Objective

The purpose of this review is to define the feeling of loneliness within a couple while taking into consideration the factors that lead a person to feel lonely in a couple or in a romantic relationship. Our goal is to understand the effects of the feeling of loneliness on these individuals during the global health crisis brought on by COVID-19 and to take these factors into account in designing effective therapeutic care. The different manifestations of loneliness in a couple should also be highlighted.

Methods

We used the PRISMA methodology to select the relevant studies. The keywords (“Solitude” or “Loneliness”) and (“Couple” or “Married” or “Partnership”) allowed us to select 19 references dealing with the theme. We conducted searches of the following databases: “Cairn”, “PsychInfo and Psycarticle”, “PubMed and Medline”, “ScienceDirect” and finally, “Web of Science” in order to find articles covering a ten-year period.

Results

There are different definitions for the subjective experience of loneliness. The review of the literature highlights the fact that loneliness can lead to positive or negative psychological consequences (it can lead to the development of creative capacity or, on the contrary, result in depression in some cases). Attachment patterns have been shown to be the basis for the tolerance of feelings of loneliness. Indeed, an anxious attachment would encourage the couple to avoid the feeling of loneliness. According to the literature, this defensive mechanism of seeking presence in the couple would make it possible to limit the impact of loneliness. This solitude depends on the level of relational quality within the couple. A poor relational quality would lead to greater loneliness and would impact intimate relationships. Loneliness is supposedly not experienced in the same way by men and women: Men seem to be more protected by marriage while women's level of loneliness may be higher because of the household chores they have to do. Men and women would nevertheless remain subject to the phenomena of contamination, i.e., when one of the partners feels lonely, the other will also be lonely. However, it seems that marriage protects against feelings of loneliness and its negative consequences. Loneliness does not have only negative effects. It can be beneficial for developing creativity and finding oneself. The periods of confinement during the COVID-19 crisis provided people with an increase in the amount of time they didn’t normally have on a daily basis. This may have been beneficial for some people and can be associated with positive emotions. Individuals who spent the lockdowns with others felt less alone and experienced less psychological distress. However, confinements did produce some negative effects on couples. The increased stress of the pandemic and the constant proximity led to an increase in spousal abuse. The consequences of confinement for couples whose relationships were already troubled resulted in frequent separation and/or divorce. The potential for conflict was related to limited financial resources, not working, and the significant risk of contracting SARS COV-2.

Conclusion

The articles dealing with the feeling of loneliness that we reviewed presented quantitative methods to the detriment of qualitative aspects and focused largely on the negative aspects of the feeling of loneliness. Other academic disciplines, such as sociology, demonstrate a lack of understanding concerning what is at stake with the feeling of loneliness. The articles intersect and tend to highlight the attachment relationships that are formed in childhood as a determining factor in the feeling of solitude later in life. The quality of the relationship, gender, and marital status are also factors to be considered. Loneliness has a clear influence on the well-being of the relationship but it is not an individual characteristic of the relationship itself. It finally appears as an individual characteristic with an impact on the assessment of the quality of the relationship and on the appreciation of the spouse.