Grown-ups at play: Theorizing quintessential interpersonal experiences of connection, novelty, and mirth

ABSTRACT Adult communicative play is a pervasive interpersonal phenomenon that manifests in myriad forms and serves a variety of intra- and interpersonal functions. Here, a conceptual definition of adult communicative play is presented, and a theory specifying the conditions and processes that give rise to such occasions is developed. Central to this effort is the conception of “quintessential play” as “ideal code-based (verbal and nonverbal) instances of interpersonal engagement, understanding, and coordination, marked by a sense of novelty and enjoyment, that are understood to count as ‘play’ by the participants themselves.” Experiences of truly quintessential play may be infrequent, but they represent the endpoint of a continuum along which all occasions of play can be seen to fall. The theoretical framework advanced here, then, addresses the role of person factors (e.g., personality traits), relationship factors (e.g., affection, power), dyadic factors (e.g., similarity), contextual factors (e.g., social rules and norms), and properties of interactions themselves, in fostering occasions of quintessential play, and that, by extension, sheds light on instances of failed play (e.g., mean-spirited teasing, bullying).