Theater Selfie

Theater Selfie Gregory Pardlo (bio) At the Richard Rodgers Theatre, I shrank my face to the boxoffice window and confessed to the Lucite's voice-ventthat I'd told my wife a lie. I had hidden no Christmas giftsin the basement, nor yet acquired tickets to Hamiltonfor my youngest as I'd boasted I would. The ticketguy pshawed and, like a chilly neighbor, acknowledged me enough to punctuate his snub.But the seat map online, I pleaded, showed several vacant dotsin March. No seats, he snapped, and we went on like this untilI looked it up on my phone. Those? He snarled, you can't—His pause—its meaning irretrievable now—was heavy withthe ghosts of Broadway's sins. It was as if a voice offstagewas force-feeding him the line: You can't afford those.His cheeks ripened to prove he'd heard it justas I'd heard it, but that, for once maybe, he'd heard it in the waythat I'd heard it. Just then, his eyes were houselightsmaking me suddenly real. The veil had fallen between us,and we two stood outside the magic. We were our only audience.As one trained in this hackneyed improv, I knew that I mightdress the specter of his fear in comedy to save him. I neededto draw him out of his head. You got kids? I asked.He nodded, but I needed to hear the emotion in his voice.What are you gunna do, huh? I laughed. It's like, what do you wantfrom me? Am I right? And he mirrored me, shaking his head:The things we do. He asked if I could bring my kid next Tuesday.Hells yeah, I said, to prove that I could stay in character, though [End Page 10] I wasn't sure where he was taking us. He bent to rootbeneath his desk. Then the Lucite spit two miracleshe must have set aside for someone else. The selfiewe took that day tells a partial story. You see us, all teethand safe as bros. You see me holding the tickets like a peace sign,but you could never guess the price we paid to get them. [End Page 11] Gregory Pardlo gregory pardlo is Co-Director of the Institute for the Study of Global Racial Justice at Rutgers University and visiting faculty at New York University Abu Dhabi. His poetry collection Spectral Evidence is forthcoming in 2024. Copyright © 2023 Yale University