We Men Must Love Our Boys

Abstract

Men are called on to step forward to mentor boys and young men whenever possible, but especially in situations where boys are in households where there is no father. The weakening of the nuclear family is in large part due to the absent father in the generations since World War II. The social institution that will replace the traditional nuclear family will likely depend on such mentoring relationships. Both the institution and nature of the relationship are being created in a time of rapid social change. It is argued that mentors as fathering figures will be important for the well-being of both boys and girls, women and men in the 21st century, but that boys are in an especially precarious situation. Originally given as an address at the biannual gathering of men at Newcastle University in Australia in 2009, the text singles out the words of the title as starting points for reflection on the importance of mentoring relationships between men and boys throughout the West. Address delivered October 8, 2009, at the 8th Australian Men’s Gathering, University of Newcastle, New South Wales, Australia. The text has been revised for publication here, but I have tried to retain the feel of spontaneity of my plenary presentation.