The influence of cultural repertoire metaphors on a specific peer group's romantic relationships

Abstract

What does it mean to love, and to be loved, in a world shaped by both mystical metaphors and modern individualism? This article presents a narrative ethnography of a friendship network of Iranian youth (the “Hejrat” group), with whom the author lived and participated between 2018 and 2022. It identifies two dominant affective orientations: one where love is considered part of life, and another where life itself is lived for love. These shifting repertoires activate under pressures of family, law, class, and gender. They are shaped by contrasting cultural grammars: mystical-poetic traditions that emphasize longing, sacrifice, and transcendence, and contemporary frameworks grounded in autonomy, equality, and mutual respect. The analysis traces how metaphors from Persian Sufi literature—such as talab (longing) or feraq (separation)—continue to structure emotional lives, often producing intense but fragile attachments. In contrast, more secular repertoires enable the cultivation of dialogic and resilient relationships. The article argues that romantic love is not merely a private experience but a moral practice where cultural metaphors, ethical selves, and existential stakes converge. It contributes to debates in the anthropology of emotion, love, and embodiment by showing how literary traditions, social conditions, and everyday life co-construct affective subjectivities.