Refining the narrative: An autoethnographic insight into academic identity construction and development in a Chinese doctoral student's journey in the United States

Abstract

What seems to be overlooked in current higher education research is the perspective of individual doctoral students in applied linguistics and how they comprehend the academic training culture within U.S. neoliberal universities. Through an autoethnographic (AE) approach, this study investigated how I as a Chinese doctoral student experienced different stages of identity negotiation in my doctoral program. The findings, which integrated theories of academic identity, the third space, and neoliberalism, were primarily derived from my self-reflection data throughout the pandemic. The arguments center around the coexistence of multiple identities and an asynchronous process of identity construction, which were influenced and shaped by study-work balance, laissez-faire supervision, the digital third space, and the pressures from neoliberal norms. The study brings insights into theoretical models from an AE perspective and recommends that higher education stakeholders adopt a flexible approach to doctoral supervision and academic publishing. Autoethnography offered a first-person perspective for in-depth meaning-making, facilitating a comprehensive and nuanced understanding of one’s academic journey of becoming.