In lieu of flowers: An a/r/tographic journey of apology and forgiveness

This research-creation project explored the tension and evolving relationship between the author and the public memorial to the victims of the Montreal massacre, a space she had been avoiding for over twenty years. The victims were fourteen women, who, in 1989, were gunned down at their university in Montreal in a violent act of misogyny. A public green space, the Place du 6-décembre-1989, was inaugurated on the tenth anniversary of the shooting and houses a monument titled, Nef pour quatorze reines. The project stemmed directly from the author’s first-time visit. The creative process enabled a conversation with matter, allowing the author to reconcile her unsettling relationship with the site and its memorial. Discomfort and vulnerability evolved into an emergent pedagogical story, and an apology in the form of tracings, or visual letters, as peace offerings to each of the fourteen women and as an act of self-forgiveness.