The silent grief of grandmothers after an out-of-order death-An interpretative phenomenological analysis.

Abstract

This study delves into the lived experiences of grandmothers grappling with grief following the "out-of-order" death of a child, child-in-law, or grandchild, using an Interpretative Phenomenological Analysis grounded in the Dual Process Model-Revised. With 70% of U.S. adults over 65 being grandparents, the research highlights their often-invisible role as both grievers and caregivers amid family loss. Findings reveal three key themes: navigating personal grief, intergenerational support dynamics, and reconstructing family identity. Grandmothers oscillate between loss-oriented and restoration-oriented coping, with grief intensity varying by relational proximity-most profound when losing their own child. They provide emotional and practical support to surviving grandchildren, yet their own sorrow is frequently overlooked, fostering isolation. The study suggests the need for enhanced recognition and tailored support for grandmothers, integrating life course theory to address the disruption of off-time deaths, ultimately advocating for a balanced approach to their bereavement process.